Hi it’s Carlos Xuma from Win With Women here and I want you to know something about me and about women who flake on you. They flake on you with reason.

But first the stuff about me: I’m not perfect… and when I want something? I just have to go and get it no matter what. Usually, that works to my advantage, but it lead to one of the biggest mistakes with women I’ve made in my life too…

You see, when I was younger I got the phone number of this beautiful Turkish girl. I’m talking the perfect tan here that no sun helped create, black, perfectly curled hair, and with those juicy lips you sometimes see and just have to kiss. And then she flaked on me.

Anyways, she had ass… she had the perfect body. The stuff you would drewl over. I don’t even remember how I got her number, but I DO remember that she lived like 2 hours away from me.

But I didn’t care, because when I want something I just have to go and get it remember?

So we called and texted back and forth many late nights and I noticed something about her. I only had to create just a little bit of attraction and she would run wild and talk dirty to me.

Beautiful girl + attracted to me + horny = any man’s dream, right? I had to see her and asked her out on a date. I was pretty damn young back then  so forget cars and such, I had to travel there by train.

Got up early in the morning, like eightish, while it was a vacation day, I was so excited, wasted 2 hours on traveling there and… she never showed up. Ever had women flake out on you too?

Then you know how I felt. Things got worse though: me and my temper caused me to text her and she made fun of me for it. She was never serious about talking to me or seeing me. Seems like some women flake in advance or something, huh?

The result: getting up way too early on a vacation day, wasting at least 4 freaking hours on traveling, and a whole lot more hours and effort on talking to a girl that wasn’t even interested in me.

Instead of being bummed out about women flaking out, I swore never to let such a blow to my ego happen ever again… and it made me invent a technique for meeting women that is still giving me success to this day…

Guess it’s time to share my technique for cashing in on situations as bad as women who flake out on you.

The Multi-Target Mindset

Most men…

– Don’t even want to meet and date a woman who lives more than an hour away from them because of stories like my own that I just told you. Understandable.

– Don’t know what to do if they approach a woman who’s with a friend or with a group of friends and can’t isolate her from the group. They think being able to isolate a woman from her friends means the difference between dating her and NOT dating her. Understandable too.

– Hell, most guys don’t even dare to approach a woman who’s not alone because they’re too insecure for that. That especially goes for women who are with family. Understandable as well.

– Don’t want to wait for their date on the spot they agreed to meet with the woman, and are frustrated (just like me once) when a woman flakes out. Understandable part 4.

The answer to all of these limitations is… STOP thinking about one woman then and there.

Remember the abundance mindset? It’s when you stop thinking of beautiful woman as being scarce, hard to find, hard to get and so on because you realize that even if only 0,1% of the world’s population would be your type…

That there would still be 6 million women to date and that you would have NO time to date them all even if you had 1 date per hour your entire life!

Well, guess what? The multi-target mindset is the “evil twin” of the abundance mindset.

How The Evil Twin Works…

It’s best if I would explain with examples:

1) A girl lives 2 hours away from you, which means you’ll need to travel 4 hours to see her. You can spend those 4 hours desperately wanting to see someone you’ve never seen before… OR, instead…

– You could spend those 4 hours calling or texting EVERY other woman you’ve met until then
– You could spend those 4 hours meeting as many new women as you possibly can. Trains aren’t empty you know. Gas stations, roads and sidewalks you travel over or past aren’t empty either.

2) You approach a woman who’s with 4 of her girlfriends and you can’t isolate her so you can get her number or make out with her… so? Because you can still:

– Go all-in. Screw that one girl, instead of getting something out of her alone, why not invite the entire group to a party at your place next week? So even if you can’t get her then, you’ll get one of the others.

– Go long term. Instead of getting one girl now, you can take a look at her and her friends. Are they pretty? Or interesting? Or both? Sure they are, that’s why you approached, right? Chances are very high that the group knows other pretty and interesting girls as well, so you befriend them and have them introduce you to their hot friends. There is NO excuse for leaving ANY group of women behind without doing isolation, all-in, or long term.

3) You don’t want to wait for your date and you definitely don’t want a woman to flake on you because it’ll be a huge waste of time… oh really?

– If she isn’t there, start calling and texting other women you’ve met. Hell, if she does show up and you’re still calling or texting a bit… so? It only shows her that you actually have a life,aren’t desperate, and don’t need her to have a good time.

– Women who never show up. Experiencing it is never any fun, but you can make it less “traumatic” for yourself. Simply meet her in a city or part of town you have to go or want to go anyway. So if she doesn’t show? You can meet women on the spot, naturally, but you can also just go about your business without sweating it, feeling stupid, and blaming yourself.

If I need a new leather coat for example, the best place for me to get it is the Black Market in Beverwijk (this little village). So I’ll meet her there and that women flakes on me? I’m still getting that coat, so what do I care?

THAT’S what all men who are insanely successful with women do: they invite her along for the ride. They invite her to be a part of their exciting life for just a little while.

Totally different perspective on things than that of the regular guy: freeing up time for a girl in between getting home from work and watching your favorite TV show, wouldn’t you agree?

So… the multi-target mindset. Stop caring so much and start living it. Keep doing your own thing, women can be a part of your life for a little while and if they don’t accept the invitation? It’s THEIR loss.

One more thing: before you decide for yourself that you’re dealing with women who flake on you, use the tips in my blog post entitled Is She Playing Hard To Get: Answers To The Age Old Question so you’ll know if she flaked on you or if she was just testing you!

To More Dating Success,

Carlos Xuma
Win With Women

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