Change Or Die?

If you HAD to change, would you? Most people, even when faced with DEATH (with an illness that’s going to cause death), WON’T change. This is because we get stuck in habit patterns: stuck in ways of thinking, stuck in our environment, stuck because of our friends and associates, stuck because of the influences around us. So break out of that comfort zone, get yourself to a new level of thinking. I want to pull your mind up out of its ways of thinking, but you have to ask yourself… Am I willing to change? Am I willing to grow? Am I willing to commit to it, commit to myself? If you are…then this part of the session maybe the MOST important thing you’ll EVER learn.

Getting Our Power BACK…

The most important question to answer in life is this one: is the universe a friendly place? People who don’t believe that the universe is a friendly place, don’t have success. They think they’re unlucky, they think that they’re poor, they think that they’re going to fail, that the universe is NOT friendly. Do YOU feel this way? That something is working against you? If that’s the way you see it…EVERYTHING becomes that way, successful people don’t want to be around you, etc. If you’re mad at the world, or mad at women…it won’t be long before you’ll drive people away, but the WORST thing is that when you DO, you make yourself into believing your view of the world is TRUE! See? They’re leaving me! I told you the universe sucked ass! WRONG!

But my friend, if you feel like that…being a powerless soul who has NO control (I used to think that a LOT)? Why not change it by taking responsibility. What? Say you’re outside strolling along, doing your thing, just walking…and all of a sudden it starts to rain cats & dogs. Now you can be mad at the world for the rain, but will it do you any good? Off course not! OR, instead, you could try to think of ways for preventing this from happening next time: where to buy an umbrella? If you hold yourself responsible for everything, you’ll have control. You see…responsibility is control. Control is power. Power is good. So BE responsible for your own success…if you find yourself sitting at home every weekend doing nothing, whose fault is it? EXACTLY. Yeah, your buddies are your friends…but they will certainly NOT introduce you to their sister so you can fuck her, just because you’ve been on a dry spell for years. The only person who truly cares about your success with women and dating is YOU, and the only one that can REALLY change the way it’s going in the end is YOU…it’s YOUR approach, YOUR talk, YOUR close, and how YOU handle the date. No one else is going to appoint you to be successful, so taking responsibility and GIVING yourself permission to be successful changes that belief that you have to look to others and get their permission to be successful!

Why Giving Up Should Not Be In YOUR Dictionary

Have you ever felt so HURT after being defeated, making a mistake or by a struggle when you thought the ride was going to be easy? I know I have. You see…MOST men give up at the first sign of defeat, of failure. When they finally have the courage to stand up and say “I suck with women and I need help, help me please” and they learn and go out? They stay inside the following days, weeks or EVEN more whenever the encounter an obstacle, why? Because it HURT. It demotivated them severely. Every minute, every hour, every day of sitting home these guys become more and more scared of going out and DOING something all the while feeling self-pity. What’s the reason for all this? Simple: MOST people stop RIGHT before they’re successful because they quit after temporary defeat, because they lack PERSISTENCE. Maybe you DID go out, DID approach a girl, DID get her email….but then you move onto to another one because she said no the first time you asked her out on a date. WRONG! And I’ve got a metaphoric story to tell you about how wrong it exactly is, my dear reader…

“…This fella named Darby was caught by the “gold fever” in the gold-rush days, and went west to dig and grow rich. He had never heard that more gold has been mined from the brains of men than has ever been taken from the earth. He staked a claim and went to work with pick and shovel. The going was hard, but his lust for gold was definite.

After weeks of labor, he was rewarded by the discovery of the shining ore. He needed machinery to bring the ore to the surface. Quietly, he covered up the mine, retraced his footsteps to his home in Williamsburg, Maryland, told his relatives and a few neighbors of the “strike.” They got together money for the needed machinery, had it shipped. Darby went back to work the mine.

The first car of ore was mined, and shipped to a smelter. The returns proved they had one of the richest mines in Colorado! A few more cars of that ore would clear the debts. Then would come the big killing in profits. Down went the drills! Up went the hopes of Darby! Then something happened! The vein of gold disappeared! They had come to the end of the rainbow, and the pot of gold was no longer there! They drilled on, desperately trying to pick up the vein again-all without success. Finally, they decided to QUIT.

They sold the machinery to a junk man for a few hundred dollars, and then took the train back home. Some “junk” men are dumb, but not this one! He called in a mining engineer to look at the mine and do a little calculating. The engineer advised that the project had failed, because the owners were not familiar with “fault lines.” His calculations showed that the vein would be found JUST THREE FEET FROM WHERE THE DARBYS HAD STOPPED DRILLING! That is exactly where it was found! The ‘junk’ man took millions of dollars in ore from the mine, because he knew enough to seek expert counsel before giving up…”

So when you think about persistence, do you REALLY want to become the next Darby my friend? Or would you rather be like Thomas Edison. Who? Edison. Edison FAILED 10.000 times before he made the incandescent electric light bulb work! Because to him? Each unsuccessful experiment was the elimination of a solution that wouldn’t work, and THAT is what persistence is all about. Every failure brings with it the seed of an equivalent success, as long as you learn from it and PERSIST! So you owe it to yourself to be the junk man, the Edison..BE persistent and live the game already will ya?

***NOTE*** And if you want learn other raw but ready realizations, powerful techniques and cutting edge seduction tactics, then you should check out the Win With Women 2.0 e-zine HERE

Onward… 

The Neverending Choice

You’ve been alone for quite some time now…you’re thinking good women are scarce, they’re hard to find…and even harder to KEEP. We fear for failure even before we go outside, we fear for rejection when we DO go outside and…most of all? We FEAR that we’ll STAY alone. Say you’re again out of food when you need a breakfast, you’re DYING to get some energy, and you RUN to the store for many, many minutes. Your forehead all sweaty, your heart seems to be pumping in your THROAT, you’re full of tension, of FEAR…will they still have cereal available for me? Well…if you KNOW the store would have an INFINITE amount of cereal in storage available for you, would you ever fear again about being out of cereal?

The world has 6 billion people on it, half of which are female. If only 10% of those were around your age, 10% of THOSE were cute, and only 10% of yet again THOSE were date material? You could pick from 3 MILLION women to date and ALL AROUND THE WORLD you would meet them! The average life expectancy for a human in our western world is 80 years. If you would date a woman EVERY DAY…for the rest of your LIFE? You would have around 2.9 million women still LEFT to date when you’re dead! Even if you would date one PER HOUR you would have over 2 million beautiful women left to date on the day you die!! Do you still think there aren’t enough beautiful women out there now?
Now go you out there and REACH that 3 million right now, meet and date them ALL!

The END Of All Your Worries

But what if I still have fear, FEAR that I will fail to do so? That I will fail to meet and date a beautiful woman, that I will get rejected by here? This fear is allll in the mind too my friend. And it’s because us humans plan our actions based on plans and EXPECTATIONS. Having NO expectations means everything at every moment in your life is a pleasant surprise. Let’s do a little thought experiment here and see what your dating world would look like if you had no expectations: You wouldn’t worry about how she’d react when you approached her. Acceptance and rejection would become meaningless. Why? There is no failure anymore, only feedback. Something is going to happen a 100% of the time, so you are guaranteed feedback and can NOT possibly fail, but only LEARN from the experience! And what is rejection anyway? If a girl doesn’t respond to you, gets mad at you for doing/saying something or says something like ‘go away!’ to you? Is it because YOU are wrong there? Who even made you THINK that!? Communication happens between TWO stations…YOU…and HER. If your TV doesn’t receive the correct channels anymore, but still displays DVDs perfectly..is it broke? HELL NO. So why do you think YOUR game is BROKE when YOU are displaying all the right behaviors then? Have you ever thought about when you approach a girl and she waves you away and says go away, that SHE is the fucked up receiving station here? That SHE is in a bad mood, unsecure, not feeling comfortable? No you haven’t, because you’ve attached your self-worth to an outcome and if there’s no outcome, there’s no self-worth. WRONG! If you don’t have any expectations, are just driving along the road in your brand new car for the first time after you got the car AND your driving license…do you STOP driving forever at the first moment you don’t recognize the road anymore? Do you STOP driving forever, after the first time you made a mistake by say…forgetting to look in the mirrors? Do you STOP driving forever, because you can’t drive to your destination in one go? No you DON’T. My point is: if you want to start and keep having success with women and dating, the road IS your destination. If there are three million women out there for you to date, why get bothered about one single outcome, one single mistake, one single woman?? Just learn a way to drive past the obstacle more smoothly next time, but keep on driving!

And if you had no expectations you wouldn’t worry about whether she’s going to call back. You wouldn’t worry about what to wear, where to take her, whether or not to pay the bill, or when to call her again. You wouldn’t worry if she’s going to kiss you goodnight or sleep with you. You would reside fully in the present and just LIVE the moment, be spontaneous and have FUN! You wouldn’t worry about a damn thing. Without expectation, you would never experience disappointment. And without disappointment, your spirit would never grow bitter, fearful of change, of failure, of rejection…because ALL outcomes are welcome since NO outcome is expected! If you want to read more about limited beliefs around YOUR outcome? Check out the article with the same name in the Inner Game Category. It will help you to finally TAKE CARE of the nervousness, the anxiety during the approach, the close, and EVEN the date itself! Because it teaches you a FAST WAY you can use to deal with being just TOO nervous, too fearful to close the deal!

You can expect more Inner Game on the blog soon, so keep an eye out for more…because there’s ALWAYS more!

To More Dating Success,

Carlos Xuma
Win With Women

P.S. Want more free tips about what I\\'ve talked about today? About raising your confidence through the roof, meeting girls anywhere & anytime, creating raw sexual attraction, and more? Make sure you get your secrets, ebooks, and email updates by signing up for my newsletter below NOW. Remember, it only takes 60 seconds to get more strategies and stealth sexual tactics, so do it. Sign up below.

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