You already know them, have seen them around you: the naturals. Ever since you’ve been a little boy, you’ve seen those guys with ‘mystical powers’ getting ALL the girls they wanted, seemingly without effort. You secretly envied them and yet, when playing Dr. Phil for your dumped ladyfriends from out of the friend zone, you disapproved of them. Meanwhile, THEY’RE getting all the action and you still can’t figure out why the ladies see THEM as men, and you as a…friend. WHY is it…that when a man has MANY options in his lovelife so that he can CHOOSE who he dates, that he is suddenly a ‘playboy’, a ‘ladiesman’, a ‘skirt chaser’? And WHY is it that a woman who’s doing the same is not a ‘playgirl’, but labeled as a whore or a slut?

It’s because of societal views on which roles men and women should play. It all starts with the modern day role of men, or rather: the lack of it. Because…

When Are Boys Being Men, And Men Being Boys?

For thousands of year humanity has had initiation rituals to mark the change from boy into MANhood and girl into WOMANhood, different ones for different cultures. Some of these rituals still exist today: the Jewish bar miztvah, the Catholic confirmation, the circumcision of boys and sometimes girls in Africa, etc.

In ancient times these rituals were much more complex and changed a person’s life much more drastically then those of today. The Japanese samurai for example had the genpuku, a historical coming-of-age ceremony. To mark the entry into adult life, boys between 12 and 16 were taken to the shrines of their patron kami (these were personified deities, gods of the Shinto faith). Here they were presented with their first adult clothes, their boy hairstyles (mazura) were changed to adult styles and they were given new adult names. The equivalent ceremony for girls was called mogi.

In these modern times however, the initiation rituals have LOST most of their cultural significance, since most of them are based on religious beliefs while there is an evergrowing number of atheists. As such, there is no clear border for today’s males between boyhood and manhood. Does a boy become a man when he graduates from high school? When he has his first drink? When he has his first kiss? When he gets laid for the first time? Since there is no clear distinction between boyhood and manhood anymore, it seems that adolescence continues allll those years after high school. Where and when does manhood REALLY begin?

That’s the question us men can’t answer. It causes confusion whether or not we’re aware of it: WHAT is our role and position in society? NO ONE KNOWS, because our programming is full of duality, of contradiction. ‘They’ will tell you: you’re a man, so be strong! Don’t cry in public! Emotions are for pussies! But be sensitive, be in touch with your feminine side, emancipate. You’re only a REAL man when you get any woman you want! Don’t be a player. Be a REAL man, a man that doesn’t take crap from women! Don’t be an egotistical male basterd, etc. etc.

These messages DEEPLY penetrate to the core of our being thanks to the programming by the media, our schools, our teachers, our friends, our girlfriends, our parents, etc. It goes from unconscious thoughts, to behaviors, to attitudes, to beliefs, to our frame of reference: our MATRIX. This constant duality goes on 24/7 within our subconcious minds and it brings forth hesitation, doubts. These lead to negative self-talk: am I doing the right thing when…? am I too much of an male chauvinist pig/feminine wussy when…? This leads to fear of failure, and together with hesitation = inaction = missed opportunities = BYE PROGRESS. And you’re wondering all this time why o why some…’THING’…is holding you back when it comes to succes with women and dating. Guess what one of the causes of that feeling is…

So think about how much you had these kinds of thoughts and try to remember specific moments in time. I’m sure you’ll realize you have been thinking these thoughts…a LOT more then you thought. But wait…there’s MORE. Don’t think the societal views of men are the only ones working against us, because the societal views on women are working against us TOO.

***NOTE*** There are so many other magical insights to share, and so little time..so if you want to get your greedy hands on more revolutionary “tricks of the trade”, then I highly recommend you check out the Win With Women 2.0 e-zine HERE

Onward…

Enslaving Women’s Minds Everywhere

When towns first started to develop into cities about 10.000 years ago, there came a need for organisation of all these masses of people. If there would be no one maintaining the order, these cities would fall into anarchy and cease to exist. As such, organized governments were created to regulate these people, including their mating habits. The family unit became CRUCIAL to maintaining cultural and religious order, so MEASURES were taken to stimulate it’s creation: marriage. Marriage was institutionalized to keep mating habits in check, leading to women’s sexual nature being limited. They no longer had the freedom to show their attraction to men they were naturally attracted to. If such men weren’t marriage material they were PROSECUTED, for example burned as witches in Europe during the Middle Ages.

Mating became more symbolic and organized as this trend continued and these cultures were soon passed on to the next generation as traditions, LIMITING how men and women got together. These together with religious concepts (read more about THIS in the coming religion part of The Matrix) FORCED women to not be promiscuous and live according to different rules then their natural biology, although the biology is still there TODAY. The result of all this: women want pleasure, WITHOUT being labeled as desperate or sluts. This makes them much more COVERT about their lovelife and/or sexual experiences, thanks to the social FAÇADE. And guess who suffers from the stereotypes society has laid upon women? MEN do because we encounter this façade, this FRONT women keep up around themselves, on a DAILY basis which makes it harder for us to approach and to close them unless we’re able to lower the shield.

Monogamy A Self-serving Scam?

MONOGAMY which was the result of marriage, was ALSO stimulated amongst men thanks to two things. First of all, if men wanted to see (mate) with a girl in ancient times, he would have to ask her father for her hand. This can still be seen in some modern-day cultures, for example the Sicilian culture. If the father would disagree, a man was FORBIDDEN to see the woman of his choice, risking the family’s vengeance (in Sicily this is called vendetta, the right to KILL a man because of family dishonor…). If the father would agree the family celebrated, because it was a sign of an upcoming marriage, and thus a bridal treasure = more WEALTH for the family. This limited the freedom to show attraction to those we were naturally attracted to EVEN MORE.

The second reason for the limiting effects of marriage, or better said monogamy, comes from our leaders. When kings and kingdoms where everywhere, the kings had personal reasons for monogamy. The ruler of the land had the RIGHT back then to select the most attractive females from the territories he ruled and create his own harem. In ancient Persia, harems could consist of over 3000 wives as well as 12.000 other females, including pleasure slaves, dancing girls and slave girls that served the aforementioned wives. Now if ALL of these women had the same sexual nature as the women of today…do you REALLY think the leader of the land could satisfy them all, EACH week? This isn’t even humanly possible! So there would ALWAYS be a number of wives sexually unsatisfied EACH week. So what do YOU think the rulers did…to keep their harem and possible male intruders in check? Promote monogamy much much more…and demand MUCH higher punishments for those not abiding by their rules.

NOW you know how societal views limit your succes with women and dating. Join me next time, my dear reader, as I go in-depth on the DEEP impact of religion on human sexual nature. I will also explore the female role in the matrix much much more in future articles.

To More Dating Success,

Carlos Xuma
Win With Women

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